Published: November 11
While looking though the MSUM Sexuality column blog, I (finally) noticed that one of the articles -“Time to Recognize,” had a comment! Firstly, let me say that I’m thrilled that someone is looking at the blog. Yay social networking!
The following is the response posted on October 8th, 2010, by an unnamed source: “While I do think people are ill informed about the GSA club on campus, I also think there is a sort of exclusionary feel toward the Rainbow Room. I have felt a little bit as though I need an invitation to come and talk and hang out or whatever, since I'm not gay myself. I think this is often the emotion of the other students. I would maybe go so far as to say some people may just be intimidated because of a lack of knowledge or information about the GLBTQAI community on campus. Maybe part of making the GSA club more visible and accepted on campus is emphasizing that GSA is about giving voice to the voiceless and empowering those who have been systematically dis-empowered. This means anyone who has a strong conviction toward this line of thinking can join or get involved.”
I’m much obliged Unnamed source, for this thought out response. Furthermore, I’m delighted that you spoke up because this topic has been at the back of my mind for months and has just now found its outlet thanks to you. I myself admit to having fallen victim to what I like it call ‘the Rainbow wall’. The Wall is a conscious, and sometimes subconscious, fear that prevents people from asking questions about or entering into the Rainbow Room. It is the invisible uncertainty that keeps students at an arms length.
So, let me say now that the Rainbow Room and the Gay Straight Alliance is for EVERYONE. We don’t have some quasi high tech gaydar system that sniffs out and rejects the straight people. The club and the Room are communities for every person on this campus. To hit this point home, in a recent meeting with Housing Representative Nina Johnson we discussed the addition of a GSA table to the Visit Day receptions starting this Friday for new students, as well a short informational meeting with the Dragon Ambassadors in December.
Until then though –Unnamed source, readers, I extend a personal invitation from me to you. Please stop by whenever you see the door open, Rainbow flag in view. Want to do more than lounge on the couches, surf the web, or read from the Rooms persona LGBT library? Drop in on a club meeting and come see us on Tuesdays at 6pm. Club matters are discussed for the first hour or so but many of us stay around and shoot the breeze till 9pm. That’s a 3 hour window of opportunity!
I’ll say it again; straight people are welcome. If you assume that everyone allowed in the Rainbow Room has to be gay or lesbian and that’s what’s keeping you from going inside, you’re sorely mistaken and you’re missing out on meeting some really great people. It doesn’t matter what genders hand you chose to hold, everyone has a voice in the Rainbow Room. Thanks for reading and I hope to see you soon. –Stay curious!
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Coming out- Being there
Published: November 4th, 2010
I’ve always believed that we can learn from stories. After all, why keep telling them if they don’t bring about anything productive. The story I wish to share with you today is partly my own, and one that is often and unfortunately a common situation.
I used to be very religious. Not so much in a devout way, but the congregation was like a second family to me. I loved the church, I loved the people, and while I hated getting up early on Sundays I did it anyway. The Pastor there was a good man in an older bother sort of way and I trusted him and considered him a friend. So when I –a 13-year-old girl at the time- told him I was attracted to other girls, I expected something reassuring to come of it.
“Don’t worry,” he said calmly. “I know a good psychiatrist.”
Shocked didn’t cover it. I didn’t want to hear that at all. I didn’t want to hear I had to go to some doctor to get ‘fixed.’ The only thing I wanted to hear was, “Don’t worry. That’s not a disease.”
To those of you have experienced it, you’ll know these words to be true: coming out is scary and the better you know someone the harder it is to tell them. Inwardly, we have to fight very hard to find ourselves. Outwardly, we have to fight against the rejection and the hatred of others.
A long and arduous process wouldn’t even begin to describe what I went through before the next time I was able to come out to another adult. When I did though it was to my high school Councilor. She was a woman I barely knew but I was at such a low point in my life I didn’t care what happened anymore. If she were to tell me I had some sort of illness at least our relationship wouldn’t suffer for the heartbreak it caused. But when I told her she just looked at me calmly and said: “It’s okay. That isn’t something to be ashamed of.”
There is nothing wrong with me; I am not sick; I am not perverted; I am not going through a ‘phase.’ I’ve long since come out to my parents and while it was rocky at first, I knew who I was and it wasn’t going to change that just to please someone else.
As we grow older, see more things, it is my hope for that the people in this world will gain compassion. People have different values and different ideas. New friends will constantly surprise you; strange people in your class, people you live with, work with, and talk with. Every person you meet from this moment on will teach you humanism and small worlds give way to broader horizons.
If you find yourself in a situation where someone you care about chooses to open their hearts to you, know this: the person who was your childhood friend, your son or your daughter, sister or brother, is still that very same person. They haven’t changed so don’t change your opinion of them. If you care about them, don’t make them scared to tell you things. We do not choose to be gay, but we do choose whom we tell. Please do not make us regret confiding in you.
For more advice on what to do if someone comes out to you, please visit the Rainbow Room in the CMU. Thanks for reading -stay curious!
I’ve always believed that we can learn from stories. After all, why keep telling them if they don’t bring about anything productive. The story I wish to share with you today is partly my own, and one that is often and unfortunately a common situation.
I used to be very religious. Not so much in a devout way, but the congregation was like a second family to me. I loved the church, I loved the people, and while I hated getting up early on Sundays I did it anyway. The Pastor there was a good man in an older bother sort of way and I trusted him and considered him a friend. So when I –a 13-year-old girl at the time- told him I was attracted to other girls, I expected something reassuring to come of it.
“Don’t worry,” he said calmly. “I know a good psychiatrist.”
Shocked didn’t cover it. I didn’t want to hear that at all. I didn’t want to hear I had to go to some doctor to get ‘fixed.’ The only thing I wanted to hear was, “Don’t worry. That’s not a disease.”
To those of you have experienced it, you’ll know these words to be true: coming out is scary and the better you know someone the harder it is to tell them. Inwardly, we have to fight very hard to find ourselves. Outwardly, we have to fight against the rejection and the hatred of others.
A long and arduous process wouldn’t even begin to describe what I went through before the next time I was able to come out to another adult. When I did though it was to my high school Councilor. She was a woman I barely knew but I was at such a low point in my life I didn’t care what happened anymore. If she were to tell me I had some sort of illness at least our relationship wouldn’t suffer for the heartbreak it caused. But when I told her she just looked at me calmly and said: “It’s okay. That isn’t something to be ashamed of.”
There is nothing wrong with me; I am not sick; I am not perverted; I am not going through a ‘phase.’ I’ve long since come out to my parents and while it was rocky at first, I knew who I was and it wasn’t going to change that just to please someone else.
As we grow older, see more things, it is my hope for that the people in this world will gain compassion. People have different values and different ideas. New friends will constantly surprise you; strange people in your class, people you live with, work with, and talk with. Every person you meet from this moment on will teach you humanism and small worlds give way to broader horizons.
If you find yourself in a situation where someone you care about chooses to open their hearts to you, know this: the person who was your childhood friend, your son or your daughter, sister or brother, is still that very same person. They haven’t changed so don’t change your opinion of them. If you care about them, don’t make them scared to tell you things. We do not choose to be gay, but we do choose whom we tell. Please do not make us regret confiding in you.
For more advice on what to do if someone comes out to you, please visit the Rainbow Room in the CMU. Thanks for reading -stay curious!
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