Also not published for some reason not yet divulged to me.
Over the years I have watched many friends and colleagues go through Army, Navy, Marine, and National Guard training and preparation. An old high school classmate of mine has just come back from a tour in Iraq and another has just shipped out, and every time I read the paper cant help but feel nervous as I scan over the news.
The military has been a huge part of our country for as long as anyone can remember and since 9/11 even the most socially inept and current event oblivious individual will have some opinion on what’s going on overseas. Wars are going on everywhere it seems, and fighting mounts even within the military itself. I speak of social fighting; the activist movements against the DADT: “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”
As someone who was in the process of enlisting in the National Guard but was forced to stop because of this aggravating “rule”, I figured it was finally time for me to give justice to all the able bodied and eager young men and women who have been hindered by this policy.
For those of you who have heard of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” but aren’t exactly familiar with the concept, allow me a moment to explain the history.
During preparation for WWII the US military added psychiatric screening to its induction process. Homosexuality at this time was labeled as an indicator of psychopathology and for the first time, homosexual people were differentiated from “normal” people in the military. In the following decades new regulations were passed concerning homosexuals serving in the military and the terms “desirable” and “undesirable” discharge were commonplace. President Bill Clinton, who had campaigned on the promise that all citizens should be allowed to serve in the military regardless of their sexual orientation, aimed to change these ways of the military. Opposing Clinton however, was the Congress. After Clinton was inaugurate Congress rushed to enact the existing gay ban policy into federal law. The policy they strove for (Defense Directive 1332.14) was that homosexuality is incompatible with military service and those persons whom engage in homosexual acts or state that they are homosexual or bisexual, were to be discharged. In order to combat this onslaught of opposition, on December 21, 1993, the Clinton Administration issued a compromise: Defense Directive 1304.26, which stated that military applicants were not to be asked about their sexual orientation. This policy is known as “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”
The DADT policy has sparked heated debate among Democrat, Republican, pro-gay, and anti-gay groups and those debates show no sign of cooling until another drastic change occurs.
Since it was implemented, Nathaniel Frank of the Advocate writes, DADT has ended the careers of more than 13,000 service members. Because of this policy, while at the time it was implemented seemed to be the only way to go, the growing awareness for gay rights has given people the opportunity to understand just how unfair the “rules” are. The pressure to conform to the hetero stereotype in the military forces people to act differently –often in negative ways such as bashing women and gays,- just so that they can stay in uniform. However it’s not just the military members that suffer. Because gay troops are prohibited from revealing their sexual orientation, their families and partners have no way of accessing the resources offered to most military families and are denied access to information about deployed family members, including their status, condition, and return dates. To anyone who has a loved one in the military, I ask you, would you be able to deal with not knowing if they had been hurt or killed in the line of duty just because you had to keep your relationship a secret? I think not.
And for those of you who have been “prematurely banned” from military service due to publicly coming out, (or even publicly advocating gay rights and issues like myself) the sad fact of the matter is that this policy prohibits good people from protecting their country and their loved ones just because they happen to be the same gender as themselves.
Friday, March 25, 2011
Trevor project.
Not published because it was deemed too controversial.
As many of you may have heard, there had been a lot of speculation about “Laramie Project,” a play portraying the events that took place before, during, and after Mathew Shepherds murder in 1998, and one of the most performed productions in America, which was being shown at Fargo South High school in weeks prior. The reason for this attention was the fact that a well-known religious group, Westboro Baptist Church, who’s extreme protests, picketing at military funerals, and anti-gay agenda have earned them the label of a hate group by the Anti-Defamation League, had made an announcement that they would stage a protest against the play.
This announcement sparked a wave of discontent and concern among many Fargo and Moorhead students of both college age and high school, especially givin the fact that the WBC also had the nerve to stage a disturbing campaign on our very campus a few years ago; a sight that quite honestly disgusted me seeing as they held it right outside the daycare.
In response to this threat of protest against the hard working students and faculty putting on the play, on February 18 in the Rainbow room, a small group of GSA members and myself banded together to make signs of support. If the WBC was going to protest, we sure as hell weren’t going to take it lying down.
On February 20, despite the blistering cold, a group of picketers from MSUM as well as the high school lined on the street opposite the building for hours to show support for the performance while a squad car waited quietly in the parking lot.
I asked a few of them if they knew about the WBCs threat to attend, and while some of them hadn’t heard about them and had just come to watch the play and support it, they were appalled at the idea of such a strong opposition being present at what was supposed to be an event meant to teach and inform the community. “It’s important for these types of messages to be supported by members of the community, and for people to learn that there are always options out there,” says NDSU picketer and attendee of the production.
I totally agree. Its depressing to think that radical groups like the WBC are still out there spreading messages of intolerance and hate, hurting good people in the process.
While the WBC did not show up at the play -a turn of events that I’m sure the school faculty were thankful for, - in preparation for the counter-protests efforts, the signs made by MSUM’s GSA organization voiced strong support of the LGBT community, including moving quotes from scripture and visually impacting signs that displayed a noose being cut with the words “Cut the Hate.” My favorite signs however were the ones that advertized The Trevor Project, whose mission it is to end suicide among LGBTQ youth by providing resources nation wide, a 24/7crisis intervention lifeline, a digital community, and educational programs.
James Lecesne, Peggy Rajski, and Randy Stone, who created the 1994 short film “Trevor,” a comedy about a gay 13-year-old boy who is rejected by his friends because of his sexuality and tries to take his own life, founded the Trevor Project. Because of the issues that the film addressed, when “Trevor” was scheduled to air on HBO, Lecesne, Rajski, and Stone decided to create a hotline for young individuals who might be faced with similar problems. This hotline, the Trevor Lifeline, became the first nationwide, 24/7 crisis and suicide prevention lifeline for LGBTQIA youth.
Jessa Dronen who came to support the play with her friend and her boyfriend, stated that she is proud of South High for putting on this production and relayed that; “Hate has no room in the community.” I am personally proud of the show of support that the community displayed for this play, made even more steadfast by the fact that everyone came despite the risk of frostbite.
To all of you who attended, I hope you will continue to support the LQBTQAI community and never let people get you down. As one of the picketers, Justine Skauge added; “I believe in it as long as it’s love.” –Stay Curious!
As many of you may have heard, there had been a lot of speculation about “Laramie Project,” a play portraying the events that took place before, during, and after Mathew Shepherds murder in 1998, and one of the most performed productions in America, which was being shown at Fargo South High school in weeks prior. The reason for this attention was the fact that a well-known religious group, Westboro Baptist Church, who’s extreme protests, picketing at military funerals, and anti-gay agenda have earned them the label of a hate group by the Anti-Defamation League, had made an announcement that they would stage a protest against the play.
This announcement sparked a wave of discontent and concern among many Fargo and Moorhead students of both college age and high school, especially givin the fact that the WBC also had the nerve to stage a disturbing campaign on our very campus a few years ago; a sight that quite honestly disgusted me seeing as they held it right outside the daycare.
In response to this threat of protest against the hard working students and faculty putting on the play, on February 18 in the Rainbow room, a small group of GSA members and myself banded together to make signs of support. If the WBC was going to protest, we sure as hell weren’t going to take it lying down.
On February 20, despite the blistering cold, a group of picketers from MSUM as well as the high school lined on the street opposite the building for hours to show support for the performance while a squad car waited quietly in the parking lot.
I asked a few of them if they knew about the WBCs threat to attend, and while some of them hadn’t heard about them and had just come to watch the play and support it, they were appalled at the idea of such a strong opposition being present at what was supposed to be an event meant to teach and inform the community. “It’s important for these types of messages to be supported by members of the community, and for people to learn that there are always options out there,” says NDSU picketer and attendee of the production.
I totally agree. Its depressing to think that radical groups like the WBC are still out there spreading messages of intolerance and hate, hurting good people in the process.
While the WBC did not show up at the play -a turn of events that I’m sure the school faculty were thankful for, - in preparation for the counter-protests efforts, the signs made by MSUM’s GSA organization voiced strong support of the LGBT community, including moving quotes from scripture and visually impacting signs that displayed a noose being cut with the words “Cut the Hate.” My favorite signs however were the ones that advertized The Trevor Project, whose mission it is to end suicide among LGBTQ youth by providing resources nation wide, a 24/7crisis intervention lifeline, a digital community, and educational programs.
James Lecesne, Peggy Rajski, and Randy Stone, who created the 1994 short film “Trevor,” a comedy about a gay 13-year-old boy who is rejected by his friends because of his sexuality and tries to take his own life, founded the Trevor Project. Because of the issues that the film addressed, when “Trevor” was scheduled to air on HBO, Lecesne, Rajski, and Stone decided to create a hotline for young individuals who might be faced with similar problems. This hotline, the Trevor Lifeline, became the first nationwide, 24/7 crisis and suicide prevention lifeline for LGBTQIA youth.
Jessa Dronen who came to support the play with her friend and her boyfriend, stated that she is proud of South High for putting on this production and relayed that; “Hate has no room in the community.” I am personally proud of the show of support that the community displayed for this play, made even more steadfast by the fact that everyone came despite the risk of frostbite.
To all of you who attended, I hope you will continue to support the LQBTQAI community and never let people get you down. As one of the picketers, Justine Skauge added; “I believe in it as long as it’s love.” –Stay Curious!
wtf: me ranting about the newspaper
Ask anyone who knows me; I don’t complain or bitch about things much. But when column (specifically asked for) does not get published in this week’s paper and I’m offered no explanation, no confirmation, and no feedback, even I get a little pissed off.
I wouldnt be as irate if this was a first time offense, but this has been the 5th time this has happened. One column (I found out 5 days later) was too long and had been replaced by a god damned full page liquor store add (a horrible moral decision for a college newspaper mind you), and another column was ‘too controversial.’ It’s a freaking OPINION column! I don’t care that bad publicity is still publicity! WBC’s got a foot long metal spike shoved up their ass’s and people should be aware of it. That wasn’t even the main topic of what I was writing about! It was a passing comment at best!
Now, I know I’m being a little unfair, after all, I know the constraints of publishing a newspaper can be brutal. You have to fit in columns about why the next Spiderman movie is an insult to die-hard fans everywhere (no offense A.H., but it’s a movie. You don’t have to watch it.) But okay, fine, I totally understand why some things would take priority over something as insignificant as facts and opinions on the “Don’t ask, Don’t Tell” policy (an area I was SPECIFICALLY HIRED to write about). Yeah, I get it. Shrug it off. You can always look forward to further rejection Tara.
…I just had to get that off my chest. It was either blog about it or kick in the window in my dorm.
I in no way mean any offense or ill intent to the nice people who work at the Advocate. I guess it’s first come first serve and my article was either too long, too late, or too controversial…
Seriously though, no ill thoughts your way.
I wouldnt be as irate if this was a first time offense, but this has been the 5th time this has happened. One column (I found out 5 days later) was too long and had been replaced by a god damned full page liquor store add (a horrible moral decision for a college newspaper mind you), and another column was ‘too controversial.’ It’s a freaking OPINION column! I don’t care that bad publicity is still publicity! WBC’s got a foot long metal spike shoved up their ass’s and people should be aware of it. That wasn’t even the main topic of what I was writing about! It was a passing comment at best!
Now, I know I’m being a little unfair, after all, I know the constraints of publishing a newspaper can be brutal. You have to fit in columns about why the next Spiderman movie is an insult to die-hard fans everywhere (no offense A.H., but it’s a movie. You don’t have to watch it.) But okay, fine, I totally understand why some things would take priority over something as insignificant as facts and opinions on the “Don’t ask, Don’t Tell” policy (an area I was SPECIFICALLY HIRED to write about). Yeah, I get it. Shrug it off. You can always look forward to further rejection Tara.
…I just had to get that off my chest. It was either blog about it or kick in the window in my dorm.
I in no way mean any offense or ill intent to the nice people who work at the Advocate. I guess it’s first come first serve and my article was either too long, too late, or too controversial…
Seriously though, no ill thoughts your way.
Friday, March 4, 2011
Chalk on the ground
published march 3, 11
As an art student, I make it a point to visit the CA Art Exhibit whenever there are new pieces being shown. This semesters BA exhibit displayed some wonderful and stimulating work created by MSUM students that showcase a wide range of talents, mediums, and ideas.
The day I attended, one piece in particular caught my eye though, or should I say, nearly caught my foot. Maia Kim Monke-Lundberg; Maia Kim for short, had made use of 3D media to render a crime scene body chalking on a black background. This piece titled “Bullied Teen,” was filled with about 200 ceramic dots that were painted to emulate the vivid colors of the rainbow, standing out brilliantly against the dark background. Around this ceramic dot body, clearly representing the presence of death, ran a long line of white ‘chalk’ text, relaying the names of teenage homosexual males and the fate that befell them.
I wanted to talk to Maia almost instantly after seeing this work, so I tracked down her email address and asked for an interview. Maia however, proved to be a very busy person indeed. An Art education major at MSUM with an emphasis in photography and ceramics and currently student teaching at Kennedy Elementary and Carl Ben Middle school, Maia was willing to meet me in person, but I didn’t want to detract from her free time so we relied on the wonders of technology and decided on an email interview.
I personally admire those who choose an education degree because kids, in all honesty, are not my forte, so already, even without the impact of her work being the reason for the interview, I already hold a good deal of respect for Maia. While I’m sure that student teaching introduces a whole slew of new time-consuming challenges, Maia says that; “As far as my artwork (is concerned), I will continue to do my own work in my spare time…. I am looking forward to being an art teacher and an artist as well!” Maia has big plans for the future and hopes to start teaching after she graduates in May. After having spent seven weeks in Korea, she hopes to live and teach there, and aims to someday teach at a college level.
Maia recognized that her work in the BA exhibit was LGBTQAI oriented she explained that it was her reaction to the severe bullying that has been going on among so many teens throughout the country. She specifically wanted to focus on what young teens were going through that ultimately led to their suicides. Oddly enough though, “Bullies Teen” was Maia’s first big piece of artwork that was focused on the LGBT community. She stated; “I have not made artwork based on sexuality issues because I think it is a very sensitive subject that needs to be taken with caution, clarity, and seriousness. If you create a piece of artwork based on topics such as suicide and that involve the LGBT community, it should make a statement. I wanted this piece to make people stop and think. I wanted them to become aware.”
Creating public awareness about the issues is indeed what Maia’s piece did, especially given the overtone of Fargo South High’s showing of the “Laramie Project” on February 20th, which Maia attended. Like this play, Maia wanted to create public awareness. She didn’t want to persuade someone’s view on the topic; she simply wanted to inform. “I wanted to create awareness of how harmful bullying is and the consequences of such hurtful words and actions towards others.”
After attending the “Laramie Project,” Maia hopes that pieces of artwork and plays continue to enable viewers to examine their beliefs about homosexuality and to become aware and confront these issues. She ended our interview with a inspiring quote from the play; "I hope what you take from this is that as world citizens, we are charged with the responsibility of compassion towards our fellow humans, compassionate thoughts, sentiments, words and actions."
As an art student, I make it a point to visit the CA Art Exhibit whenever there are new pieces being shown. This semesters BA exhibit displayed some wonderful and stimulating work created by MSUM students that showcase a wide range of talents, mediums, and ideas.
The day I attended, one piece in particular caught my eye though, or should I say, nearly caught my foot. Maia Kim Monke-Lundberg; Maia Kim for short, had made use of 3D media to render a crime scene body chalking on a black background. This piece titled “Bullied Teen,” was filled with about 200 ceramic dots that were painted to emulate the vivid colors of the rainbow, standing out brilliantly against the dark background. Around this ceramic dot body, clearly representing the presence of death, ran a long line of white ‘chalk’ text, relaying the names of teenage homosexual males and the fate that befell them.
I wanted to talk to Maia almost instantly after seeing this work, so I tracked down her email address and asked for an interview. Maia however, proved to be a very busy person indeed. An Art education major at MSUM with an emphasis in photography and ceramics and currently student teaching at Kennedy Elementary and Carl Ben Middle school, Maia was willing to meet me in person, but I didn’t want to detract from her free time so we relied on the wonders of technology and decided on an email interview.
I personally admire those who choose an education degree because kids, in all honesty, are not my forte, so already, even without the impact of her work being the reason for the interview, I already hold a good deal of respect for Maia. While I’m sure that student teaching introduces a whole slew of new time-consuming challenges, Maia says that; “As far as my artwork (is concerned), I will continue to do my own work in my spare time…. I am looking forward to being an art teacher and an artist as well!” Maia has big plans for the future and hopes to start teaching after she graduates in May. After having spent seven weeks in Korea, she hopes to live and teach there, and aims to someday teach at a college level.
Maia recognized that her work in the BA exhibit was LGBTQAI oriented she explained that it was her reaction to the severe bullying that has been going on among so many teens throughout the country. She specifically wanted to focus on what young teens were going through that ultimately led to their suicides. Oddly enough though, “Bullies Teen” was Maia’s first big piece of artwork that was focused on the LGBT community. She stated; “I have not made artwork based on sexuality issues because I think it is a very sensitive subject that needs to be taken with caution, clarity, and seriousness. If you create a piece of artwork based on topics such as suicide and that involve the LGBT community, it should make a statement. I wanted this piece to make people stop and think. I wanted them to become aware.”
Creating public awareness about the issues is indeed what Maia’s piece did, especially given the overtone of Fargo South High’s showing of the “Laramie Project” on February 20th, which Maia attended. Like this play, Maia wanted to create public awareness. She didn’t want to persuade someone’s view on the topic; she simply wanted to inform. “I wanted to create awareness of how harmful bullying is and the consequences of such hurtful words and actions towards others.”
After attending the “Laramie Project,” Maia hopes that pieces of artwork and plays continue to enable viewers to examine their beliefs about homosexuality and to become aware and confront these issues. She ended our interview with a inspiring quote from the play; "I hope what you take from this is that as world citizens, we are charged with the responsibility of compassion towards our fellow humans, compassionate thoughts, sentiments, words and actions."
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
V-Day Toxic
Published February 17th 2011
While I do get feedback from readers occasionally, once and a while someone comes to me with a question in need of answering. While emailing with an old high school friend about relationship troubles, he asked me this: “I really want to break up with my boyfriend of two years, but every time I’ve tried to, he makes the excuse that it’s because I’m not really gay and that I was just using him as an ‘experiment.’ I know I’m gay, but I end up hanging on because of some weird guilt trip. I don’t want the fact that I’m gay to be questioned. It’s Infuriating!”
Infuriating indeed my friend. Instead of giving him a little quip of an email as a response, I decided to take this Q&A to newsprint. First of all, I’ve seen many relationships where partner A is currently questioning their sexuality and partner B is already out of the closet. Many times these relationships don’t work out because of the initial doubt already in place before the relationship started. Partner B can eventually feel like they aren’t being taken seriously, and partner A can feel like they are being pushed into something that they aren’t ready for.
In this case, however, I know for a fact that my friend is 100% homosexual and that his boyfriend, “Sam,” is just refusing to let go. By saying that he is being considered as an ‘experiment’, “Sam” was perhaps already unsteady about the relationship in the first place and felt that neither of them was ever fully committed to making it work (odd for a relationship that has lasted for two years). However, when one person in a relationship wants to end it and the only way to keep them there is to ‘guilt trip’ them, the relationship has already tipped to the unhealthy side of the scale.
If my friend really wants to end things and is only afraid of leaving because “Sam” will think that he has been used, it’s not a good enough reason for him to stick around. My advice for my friend is to be taken with caution because I have not had the chance to speak with the other party involved, and it is always wise, before seeking advice of a third party or giving advice as the third party, to know the thoughts of others.
In the time impending Valentines celebrations, I say to my friend; it’s time to end the toxic association and move on. Be assertive when dealing with touchy subjects and be clear about what you feel. No one wants to be unhappy come Valentines Day after all. Signing off after what I hope is an informative column about relationship woes, yours truly –Stay curious!
While I do get feedback from readers occasionally, once and a while someone comes to me with a question in need of answering. While emailing with an old high school friend about relationship troubles, he asked me this: “I really want to break up with my boyfriend of two years, but every time I’ve tried to, he makes the excuse that it’s because I’m not really gay and that I was just using him as an ‘experiment.’ I know I’m gay, but I end up hanging on because of some weird guilt trip. I don’t want the fact that I’m gay to be questioned. It’s Infuriating!”
Infuriating indeed my friend. Instead of giving him a little quip of an email as a response, I decided to take this Q&A to newsprint. First of all, I’ve seen many relationships where partner A is currently questioning their sexuality and partner B is already out of the closet. Many times these relationships don’t work out because of the initial doubt already in place before the relationship started. Partner B can eventually feel like they aren’t being taken seriously, and partner A can feel like they are being pushed into something that they aren’t ready for.
In this case, however, I know for a fact that my friend is 100% homosexual and that his boyfriend, “Sam,” is just refusing to let go. By saying that he is being considered as an ‘experiment’, “Sam” was perhaps already unsteady about the relationship in the first place and felt that neither of them was ever fully committed to making it work (odd for a relationship that has lasted for two years). However, when one person in a relationship wants to end it and the only way to keep them there is to ‘guilt trip’ them, the relationship has already tipped to the unhealthy side of the scale.
If my friend really wants to end things and is only afraid of leaving because “Sam” will think that he has been used, it’s not a good enough reason for him to stick around. My advice for my friend is to be taken with caution because I have not had the chance to speak with the other party involved, and it is always wise, before seeking advice of a third party or giving advice as the third party, to know the thoughts of others.
In the time impending Valentines celebrations, I say to my friend; it’s time to end the toxic association and move on. Be assertive when dealing with touchy subjects and be clear about what you feel. No one wants to be unhappy come Valentines Day after all. Signing off after what I hope is an informative column about relationship woes, yours truly –Stay curious!
LGBTQAI events
Published Feb. 3, 2011
Learning about the different communities and cultures is an essential part of the college experience. It offers individuals a chance to grow considerably as human beings and grants rare insights into things one might not normally get to experience in their daily lives. MSUM offers a fantastic variety of programs, lectures, and colloquiums that cater to the ever-growing student and faculty hunger for knowledge, and on February 10, humanitarian awareness and intellectual expansion will get yet another boost from two events being held in the CMU.
The first event, taking place from 1pm-4pm in the CMU Ballroom, is MSUM Safe Zone Training, sponsored by the MSUM Office of Diversity and Inclusion. This informational meeting, led by Donna Brown, APV of student Affairs for Diversity and Inclusion, and Kyle Rausch, Admissions Councilor, aims to educate and inform individuals about LGBTQAI. “A Safe Zone,” Brown says, “is a place where someone can go and feel comfortable talking about LGBTQAI issues, or to talk about anything without fear of discrimination.” Those who attend the session will be provided with the resources they need to establish a safe and welcoming atmosphere for LGBTQAI persons. Brown feels that “the more people we can educate and assist with being comfortable discussing LGBTQAI issues the better.” Brown strongly urges students in leadership positions such as SOCs and RAs to attend the meeting. There are many faculty members throughout the MSUM campus whose offices already feature the colorful Safe Zone sticker on their doors. MSUM History professor Annette Morrow and Safe Zone ally who has been approached multiple times by students interested in finding information or counseling services, has this to say of the program; “The Safe Zone program provided me with information about how to handle situations –and about where to send students for help if they needed it. I am personally gratified when I have good answers for students who are questioning or in crisis.” Like Brown, Morrow believes that it is important that students know there are places they can go to chant freely without the worry of judgment
A full list of MSUM Safe Zone contact names and numbers can be found at http://www.mnstate.edu/safezone/contacts_dept.cfm.
During the second event, Rainbow Rice, held only on February 10 from 7pm-8pm in CMU 101, guest speaker Pamela Roy will talk about the complex and intersecting nature of race, ethnicity, class, gender, and sexual orientation as it pertains to members of the Asian/Asian Diaspora communities. Roy holds a national leadership position as the Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgendered Issues Knowledge Community Co-Chair for NASPA, Student Affairs Administrators in Higher Education. Brown, who knows Roy personally, believes that Roy will bring something unique to the table and leave attendees feeling that this “Wasn’t that same old lecture.” Brown feels that “We sometime skim the surface of topics such as the LGBTQAI community. We need to dig a little deeper and take more interest in the individuals and the individual situations.”
The context of the Rainbow Rice lecture will look at the experiences of South Asian lesbian, gay, bisexual and queer-identified student/administrators/faculty; South Asian transgender graduate students; Indian South African faculty in post colonial contexts, and students of color at faith-based institutions. While Rainbow Rice is open to everyone, the lecture would be particularly beneficial towards students interested in Multicultural, Gender, and Sociology studies.
A second Safe Zone informational meeting will also take place March 10 at the same time and place. For more information pertaining to either of these events, go to the Rainbow Room located in the CMU, contact Donna Brown at donna.brown@mnstate.edu, Kyle Rausch at kyle.rausch@mnstate.edu, or Anita Bender at anita.bender@mnstate.edu.
“Our true desire to be prepared to live and work in a diverse community,” Brown concluded, “is reflected in the attendance and participation of events of this type.”
Learning about the different communities and cultures is an essential part of the college experience. It offers individuals a chance to grow considerably as human beings and grants rare insights into things one might not normally get to experience in their daily lives. MSUM offers a fantastic variety of programs, lectures, and colloquiums that cater to the ever-growing student and faculty hunger for knowledge, and on February 10, humanitarian awareness and intellectual expansion will get yet another boost from two events being held in the CMU.
The first event, taking place from 1pm-4pm in the CMU Ballroom, is MSUM Safe Zone Training, sponsored by the MSUM Office of Diversity and Inclusion. This informational meeting, led by Donna Brown, APV of student Affairs for Diversity and Inclusion, and Kyle Rausch, Admissions Councilor, aims to educate and inform individuals about LGBTQAI. “A Safe Zone,” Brown says, “is a place where someone can go and feel comfortable talking about LGBTQAI issues, or to talk about anything without fear of discrimination.” Those who attend the session will be provided with the resources they need to establish a safe and welcoming atmosphere for LGBTQAI persons. Brown feels that “the more people we can educate and assist with being comfortable discussing LGBTQAI issues the better.” Brown strongly urges students in leadership positions such as SOCs and RAs to attend the meeting. There are many faculty members throughout the MSUM campus whose offices already feature the colorful Safe Zone sticker on their doors. MSUM History professor Annette Morrow and Safe Zone ally who has been approached multiple times by students interested in finding information or counseling services, has this to say of the program; “The Safe Zone program provided me with information about how to handle situations –and about where to send students for help if they needed it. I am personally gratified when I have good answers for students who are questioning or in crisis.” Like Brown, Morrow believes that it is important that students know there are places they can go to chant freely without the worry of judgment
A full list of MSUM Safe Zone contact names and numbers can be found at http://www.mnstate.edu/safezone/contacts_dept.cfm.
During the second event, Rainbow Rice, held only on February 10 from 7pm-8pm in CMU 101, guest speaker Pamela Roy will talk about the complex and intersecting nature of race, ethnicity, class, gender, and sexual orientation as it pertains to members of the Asian/Asian Diaspora communities. Roy holds a national leadership position as the Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgendered Issues Knowledge Community Co-Chair for NASPA, Student Affairs Administrators in Higher Education. Brown, who knows Roy personally, believes that Roy will bring something unique to the table and leave attendees feeling that this “Wasn’t that same old lecture.” Brown feels that “We sometime skim the surface of topics such as the LGBTQAI community. We need to dig a little deeper and take more interest in the individuals and the individual situations.”
The context of the Rainbow Rice lecture will look at the experiences of South Asian lesbian, gay, bisexual and queer-identified student/administrators/faculty; South Asian transgender graduate students; Indian South African faculty in post colonial contexts, and students of color at faith-based institutions. While Rainbow Rice is open to everyone, the lecture would be particularly beneficial towards students interested in Multicultural, Gender, and Sociology studies.
A second Safe Zone informational meeting will also take place March 10 at the same time and place. For more information pertaining to either of these events, go to the Rainbow Room located in the CMU, contact Donna Brown at donna.brown@mnstate.edu, Kyle Rausch at kyle.rausch@mnstate.edu, or Anita Bender at anita.bender@mnstate.edu.
“Our true desire to be prepared to live and work in a diverse community,” Brown concluded, “is reflected in the attendance and participation of events of this type.”
PFund Scholarship
Published....
There are so many scholarships and grants running amuck today that it seems there is one for just about everybody. Even though they are still incredibly hard to get, smaller scholarships are aimed at minorities who may need a helping hand when perusing their education. PFund is one such scholarship.
Founded in 1987 with a modest fund of $2000, the Philanthrofund Foundations vision was to become a catalyst in building communities in Minnesota where gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people live their lives free from discrimination, violence, invisibility, and isolation. The scholarship is designed to support and develop the LGBTQAI community in Minnesota, South Dakota, and North Dakota. Today the PFund is still a non-profit organization that works hard to develop a strong base and support for community members by providing scholarships that range from $2,000 to $5,000.
Over the years, the PFund scholarship has gained recognition through awards such as the Twin Cities Pride Community Pride Award in 2010, and was a finalist for the Minnesota Council of Nonprofits' Nonprofit Mission Award for Anti-Racism Initiative in 2009. Such recognition has created many opportunities for students all over the country to be recognized for their contributions and efforts in the LGBT community.
A recent PFund applicant from MSUM states, “I know there are allot of people applying for this scholarship, but I think that it’s great opportunity to at least send in an application. Getting recognized for hard work is always nice, even if I don’t end up getting the scholarship.”
The judging criteria for the PFund scholarships is as follows: applicant’s must make an affirmation of LGBT or allied identity, there must be evidence of significant service and leadership in the LGBT community, and evidence of serving, leading and working for change in LGBT communities, including as a role model, mentor and/or adviser.
For testimonials of past recipients or for more information about this unique scholarship program, visit http://www.pfundonline.org/index.html, or come to the Rainbow Dragon Room in the CMU and pick up an application.
The deadline for the PFund scholarship is on February 1, so it’s coming up fast! If you are at all interested in applying, don’t hesitate. A little money can go a long way and a little effort can be recognized. Best of luck to you who have already applied! Stay tuned for more columns from your own personal LGBT MSUM source–Stay curious.
There are so many scholarships and grants running amuck today that it seems there is one for just about everybody. Even though they are still incredibly hard to get, smaller scholarships are aimed at minorities who may need a helping hand when perusing their education. PFund is one such scholarship.
Founded in 1987 with a modest fund of $2000, the Philanthrofund Foundations vision was to become a catalyst in building communities in Minnesota where gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people live their lives free from discrimination, violence, invisibility, and isolation. The scholarship is designed to support and develop the LGBTQAI community in Minnesota, South Dakota, and North Dakota. Today the PFund is still a non-profit organization that works hard to develop a strong base and support for community members by providing scholarships that range from $2,000 to $5,000.
Over the years, the PFund scholarship has gained recognition through awards such as the Twin Cities Pride Community Pride Award in 2010, and was a finalist for the Minnesota Council of Nonprofits' Nonprofit Mission Award for Anti-Racism Initiative in 2009. Such recognition has created many opportunities for students all over the country to be recognized for their contributions and efforts in the LGBT community.
A recent PFund applicant from MSUM states, “I know there are allot of people applying for this scholarship, but I think that it’s great opportunity to at least send in an application. Getting recognized for hard work is always nice, even if I don’t end up getting the scholarship.”
The judging criteria for the PFund scholarships is as follows: applicant’s must make an affirmation of LGBT or allied identity, there must be evidence of significant service and leadership in the LGBT community, and evidence of serving, leading and working for change in LGBT communities, including as a role model, mentor and/or adviser.
For testimonials of past recipients or for more information about this unique scholarship program, visit http://www.pfundonline.org/index.html, or come to the Rainbow Dragon Room in the CMU and pick up an application.
The deadline for the PFund scholarship is on February 1, so it’s coming up fast! If you are at all interested in applying, don’t hesitate. A little money can go a long way and a little effort can be recognized. Best of luck to you who have already applied! Stay tuned for more columns from your own personal LGBT MSUM source–Stay curious.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Thursday, January 13, 2011
What Isn't in a name?
published January 13
You eat it, you try to spell your name in it, and it’s probably very high in sodium. Well, at least that’s one way of looking at Alphabet soup. Another way is through LGBTQIA; the far more wholesome alphabet soup that I‘m here to tell you about today. This mouthful of letters stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgendered, Questioning, Intersex, and Allies.
I was asked recently why such a ridiculously long and inclusive acronym is used to define a group. Believe it or not -note my sarcasm here please- the homosexual community and all their affiliates are still considered a pretty touchy subject to many people. Insert one of my life philosophies: people are like ostriches. They think that if they bury their head in the sand, they aren’t susceptible to the world outside. But if the world comes and bites the ostrich in its big feathered butt, surprise! Hello world, I’m listening now.
So why go to such lengths to include Intersex, Allies, Transgendered, and Questioning into the mix? Another astute inquiry. The answer, simply, is that if you call a person out by name, their conditioned response is to answer back or look. If a person on the street was shouting, “Everyone come to the party,” you may simply ignore them. But if they said, “(Insert your name), come to the party!” Wouldn’t you look?
Earlier in the year one of my articles stated that you don’t have to be gay to come to the GSA Rainbow room. Put simply, you don’t have to be in the rainbow to enjoy the refracted light. The inclusion of “S” in Gay Straight Alliance is so that even those individuals who are not homosexual know that they are welcome any time. This message, I believe, is mirrored in this long list of letters of Alphabet soup.
It is no secret that with sensitive issues like homosexuality and the LGBTQIA vista, many people won’t get involved unless they’re called out directly (I refer to my ‘world biting the ostrich in the butt” metaphor again). The reason that we go to such lengths to be inclusive, even reaching out to straight Allies, people currently Questioning their gender identity or sexual orientation, and Transgendered peoples, is because the very point and basis for the GSA community is to include EVERYONE in the effort for a more humanizing world.
I know it’s still a mouthful, and sure, I’d rather say the Everybody Club rather than LGBTQIA, but calling out each individual by name is a more effective way of getting people involved with a movement that really shouldn’t –after all this time- need to be a ‘movement’ at all.
There is no real difference between a gay person and a straight person (or transgendered, or questioning, or bisexual). We just like different thing, and is that really so different at all? That is my 101 on why the LGBTQIA acronym is so inclusive. No matter who you love, you’re just a person, like everybody else.
You eat it, you try to spell your name in it, and it’s probably very high in sodium. Well, at least that’s one way of looking at Alphabet soup. Another way is through LGBTQIA; the far more wholesome alphabet soup that I‘m here to tell you about today. This mouthful of letters stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgendered, Questioning, Intersex, and Allies.
I was asked recently why such a ridiculously long and inclusive acronym is used to define a group. Believe it or not -note my sarcasm here please- the homosexual community and all their affiliates are still considered a pretty touchy subject to many people. Insert one of my life philosophies: people are like ostriches. They think that if they bury their head in the sand, they aren’t susceptible to the world outside. But if the world comes and bites the ostrich in its big feathered butt, surprise! Hello world, I’m listening now.
So why go to such lengths to include Intersex, Allies, Transgendered, and Questioning into the mix? Another astute inquiry. The answer, simply, is that if you call a person out by name, their conditioned response is to answer back or look. If a person on the street was shouting, “Everyone come to the party,” you may simply ignore them. But if they said, “(Insert your name), come to the party!” Wouldn’t you look?
Earlier in the year one of my articles stated that you don’t have to be gay to come to the GSA Rainbow room. Put simply, you don’t have to be in the rainbow to enjoy the refracted light. The inclusion of “S” in Gay Straight Alliance is so that even those individuals who are not homosexual know that they are welcome any time. This message, I believe, is mirrored in this long list of letters of Alphabet soup.
It is no secret that with sensitive issues like homosexuality and the LGBTQIA vista, many people won’t get involved unless they’re called out directly (I refer to my ‘world biting the ostrich in the butt” metaphor again). The reason that we go to such lengths to be inclusive, even reaching out to straight Allies, people currently Questioning their gender identity or sexual orientation, and Transgendered peoples, is because the very point and basis for the GSA community is to include EVERYONE in the effort for a more humanizing world.
I know it’s still a mouthful, and sure, I’d rather say the Everybody Club rather than LGBTQIA, but calling out each individual by name is a more effective way of getting people involved with a movement that really shouldn’t –after all this time- need to be a ‘movement’ at all.
There is no real difference between a gay person and a straight person (or transgendered, or questioning, or bisexual). We just like different thing, and is that really so different at all? That is my 101 on why the LGBTQIA acronym is so inclusive. No matter who you love, you’re just a person, like everybody else.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Something New
published December 9, 2010
As we cram for finals and rush to finish last minuet projects, the elusive dream of finally venturing home for the holidays drifts closer. Seeing old friends and family and spending what’s left of our paychecks on gifts that will possibly get returned will consume your winter break, therefore before you get to all that fun, I feel the need to leave you with a small news update from school and the surrounding area.
To kick off the second night of opening at the Red Ravens new venue, Lacey Scheelk and a group of 10 other poets got together on December 2 for the second GLTBQAI poetry night. The new location on Main Ave, Fargo ND is certainly a change from Red Raven’s former scene. A confined basement room has given way to the high lofted ceiling, salmon pink walls, hanging glass ball lights, and massive doors of an old firehouse. Parking is limited, but seeing as it’s just a bus ride and short walk away from MSUM campus, the commute is more than reasonable. Amidst the sounds of the coffee maker and the construction that accompanies the work in progress coffee house, the space accommodated a total of about 30 guests including myself and some university professors.
The order of the readers was decided by drawing names of a hat and the organizer of the even –quite appropriately- was the first up, delighting everyone with a short song tribute to Adam Lambert as well as a prose poem from class. Justine Breedon voiced her thoughts on the “mush left by Bush”, and Akshat Sharma left me particularly satisfied with his satirical poems, love letter with a twist, and the March Hare: a Gay Conduct Novel. The rest of the night included; Hidden Psalms, a 4th grade poem about rain being mother earth’s tears, Annual Resistance, songs and improvisation accompanied by drums reminding us to slow down and take our time in life, and even a brilliantly awkward piece about Green Spandex. The night ended with, get this: a knighting. Scheelk, leaving MSUM for MN State in Minneapolis, dubbed two poets Amy Schobinger; Lady of Words, and Danica Maloney; Dame of Pages as her successors who will continue with the tradition of poetry night in the future.
Not being a particularly adamant frequenter of the poetry scene, I was pleasantly surprised with the whole experience and I’m glad that I was able to go, even when being pulled around by the pinkies by the café owner’s young daughter. Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a plug for poetry readings all over the world, but in a small community where one of the readers may very well be someone in your class, or even someone you know, it really is worth it to be involved in. As Amanda read from a poem she wrote on her phone, “it’s time to learn something new, every day.”
There will be more opportunities to get involved with the GSA scene and I hope to see you readers at the next event! You might enjoy it more than you think.
To wrap up this semester, I offer a heartfelt thanks to all the wonderful poets and guests who attended the second event at Red Raven. Have a wonderful and safe winter break and look forward to weekly sexuality columns from yours truly next semester! Stay curious.
As we cram for finals and rush to finish last minuet projects, the elusive dream of finally venturing home for the holidays drifts closer. Seeing old friends and family and spending what’s left of our paychecks on gifts that will possibly get returned will consume your winter break, therefore before you get to all that fun, I feel the need to leave you with a small news update from school and the surrounding area.
To kick off the second night of opening at the Red Ravens new venue, Lacey Scheelk and a group of 10 other poets got together on December 2 for the second GLTBQAI poetry night. The new location on Main Ave, Fargo ND is certainly a change from Red Raven’s former scene. A confined basement room has given way to the high lofted ceiling, salmon pink walls, hanging glass ball lights, and massive doors of an old firehouse. Parking is limited, but seeing as it’s just a bus ride and short walk away from MSUM campus, the commute is more than reasonable. Amidst the sounds of the coffee maker and the construction that accompanies the work in progress coffee house, the space accommodated a total of about 30 guests including myself and some university professors.
The order of the readers was decided by drawing names of a hat and the organizer of the even –quite appropriately- was the first up, delighting everyone with a short song tribute to Adam Lambert as well as a prose poem from class. Justine Breedon voiced her thoughts on the “mush left by Bush”, and Akshat Sharma left me particularly satisfied with his satirical poems, love letter with a twist, and the March Hare: a Gay Conduct Novel. The rest of the night included; Hidden Psalms, a 4th grade poem about rain being mother earth’s tears, Annual Resistance, songs and improvisation accompanied by drums reminding us to slow down and take our time in life, and even a brilliantly awkward piece about Green Spandex. The night ended with, get this: a knighting. Scheelk, leaving MSUM for MN State in Minneapolis, dubbed two poets Amy Schobinger; Lady of Words, and Danica Maloney; Dame of Pages as her successors who will continue with the tradition of poetry night in the future.
Not being a particularly adamant frequenter of the poetry scene, I was pleasantly surprised with the whole experience and I’m glad that I was able to go, even when being pulled around by the pinkies by the café owner’s young daughter. Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a plug for poetry readings all over the world, but in a small community where one of the readers may very well be someone in your class, or even someone you know, it really is worth it to be involved in. As Amanda read from a poem she wrote on her phone, “it’s time to learn something new, every day.”
There will be more opportunities to get involved with the GSA scene and I hope to see you readers at the next event! You might enjoy it more than you think.
To wrap up this semester, I offer a heartfelt thanks to all the wonderful poets and guests who attended the second event at Red Raven. Have a wonderful and safe winter break and look forward to weekly sexuality columns from yours truly next semester! Stay curious.
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Voice to the Voiceless
Published: November 11
While looking though the MSUM Sexuality column blog, I (finally) noticed that one of the articles -“Time to Recognize,” had a comment! Firstly, let me say that I’m thrilled that someone is looking at the blog. Yay social networking!
The following is the response posted on October 8th, 2010, by an unnamed source: “While I do think people are ill informed about the GSA club on campus, I also think there is a sort of exclusionary feel toward the Rainbow Room. I have felt a little bit as though I need an invitation to come and talk and hang out or whatever, since I'm not gay myself. I think this is often the emotion of the other students. I would maybe go so far as to say some people may just be intimidated because of a lack of knowledge or information about the GLBTQAI community on campus. Maybe part of making the GSA club more visible and accepted on campus is emphasizing that GSA is about giving voice to the voiceless and empowering those who have been systematically dis-empowered. This means anyone who has a strong conviction toward this line of thinking can join or get involved.”
I’m much obliged Unnamed source, for this thought out response. Furthermore, I’m delighted that you spoke up because this topic has been at the back of my mind for months and has just now found its outlet thanks to you. I myself admit to having fallen victim to what I like it call ‘the Rainbow wall’. The Wall is a conscious, and sometimes subconscious, fear that prevents people from asking questions about or entering into the Rainbow Room. It is the invisible uncertainty that keeps students at an arms length.
So, let me say now that the Rainbow Room and the Gay Straight Alliance is for EVERYONE. We don’t have some quasi high tech gaydar system that sniffs out and rejects the straight people. The club and the Room are communities for every person on this campus. To hit this point home, in a recent meeting with Housing Representative Nina Johnson we discussed the addition of a GSA table to the Visit Day receptions starting this Friday for new students, as well a short informational meeting with the Dragon Ambassadors in December.
Until then though –Unnamed source, readers, I extend a personal invitation from me to you. Please stop by whenever you see the door open, Rainbow flag in view. Want to do more than lounge on the couches, surf the web, or read from the Rooms persona LGBT library? Drop in on a club meeting and come see us on Tuesdays at 6pm. Club matters are discussed for the first hour or so but many of us stay around and shoot the breeze till 9pm. That’s a 3 hour window of opportunity!
I’ll say it again; straight people are welcome. If you assume that everyone allowed in the Rainbow Room has to be gay or lesbian and that’s what’s keeping you from going inside, you’re sorely mistaken and you’re missing out on meeting some really great people. It doesn’t matter what genders hand you chose to hold, everyone has a voice in the Rainbow Room. Thanks for reading and I hope to see you soon. –Stay curious!
While looking though the MSUM Sexuality column blog, I (finally) noticed that one of the articles -“Time to Recognize,” had a comment! Firstly, let me say that I’m thrilled that someone is looking at the blog. Yay social networking!
The following is the response posted on October 8th, 2010, by an unnamed source: “While I do think people are ill informed about the GSA club on campus, I also think there is a sort of exclusionary feel toward the Rainbow Room. I have felt a little bit as though I need an invitation to come and talk and hang out or whatever, since I'm not gay myself. I think this is often the emotion of the other students. I would maybe go so far as to say some people may just be intimidated because of a lack of knowledge or information about the GLBTQAI community on campus. Maybe part of making the GSA club more visible and accepted on campus is emphasizing that GSA is about giving voice to the voiceless and empowering those who have been systematically dis-empowered. This means anyone who has a strong conviction toward this line of thinking can join or get involved.”
I’m much obliged Unnamed source, for this thought out response. Furthermore, I’m delighted that you spoke up because this topic has been at the back of my mind for months and has just now found its outlet thanks to you. I myself admit to having fallen victim to what I like it call ‘the Rainbow wall’. The Wall is a conscious, and sometimes subconscious, fear that prevents people from asking questions about or entering into the Rainbow Room. It is the invisible uncertainty that keeps students at an arms length.
So, let me say now that the Rainbow Room and the Gay Straight Alliance is for EVERYONE. We don’t have some quasi high tech gaydar system that sniffs out and rejects the straight people. The club and the Room are communities for every person on this campus. To hit this point home, in a recent meeting with Housing Representative Nina Johnson we discussed the addition of a GSA table to the Visit Day receptions starting this Friday for new students, as well a short informational meeting with the Dragon Ambassadors in December.
Until then though –Unnamed source, readers, I extend a personal invitation from me to you. Please stop by whenever you see the door open, Rainbow flag in view. Want to do more than lounge on the couches, surf the web, or read from the Rooms persona LGBT library? Drop in on a club meeting and come see us on Tuesdays at 6pm. Club matters are discussed for the first hour or so but many of us stay around and shoot the breeze till 9pm. That’s a 3 hour window of opportunity!
I’ll say it again; straight people are welcome. If you assume that everyone allowed in the Rainbow Room has to be gay or lesbian and that’s what’s keeping you from going inside, you’re sorely mistaken and you’re missing out on meeting some really great people. It doesn’t matter what genders hand you chose to hold, everyone has a voice in the Rainbow Room. Thanks for reading and I hope to see you soon. –Stay curious!
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Coming out- Being there
Published: November 4th, 2010
I’ve always believed that we can learn from stories. After all, why keep telling them if they don’t bring about anything productive. The story I wish to share with you today is partly my own, and one that is often and unfortunately a common situation.
I used to be very religious. Not so much in a devout way, but the congregation was like a second family to me. I loved the church, I loved the people, and while I hated getting up early on Sundays I did it anyway. The Pastor there was a good man in an older bother sort of way and I trusted him and considered him a friend. So when I –a 13-year-old girl at the time- told him I was attracted to other girls, I expected something reassuring to come of it.
“Don’t worry,” he said calmly. “I know a good psychiatrist.”
Shocked didn’t cover it. I didn’t want to hear that at all. I didn’t want to hear I had to go to some doctor to get ‘fixed.’ The only thing I wanted to hear was, “Don’t worry. That’s not a disease.”
To those of you have experienced it, you’ll know these words to be true: coming out is scary and the better you know someone the harder it is to tell them. Inwardly, we have to fight very hard to find ourselves. Outwardly, we have to fight against the rejection and the hatred of others.
A long and arduous process wouldn’t even begin to describe what I went through before the next time I was able to come out to another adult. When I did though it was to my high school Councilor. She was a woman I barely knew but I was at such a low point in my life I didn’t care what happened anymore. If she were to tell me I had some sort of illness at least our relationship wouldn’t suffer for the heartbreak it caused. But when I told her she just looked at me calmly and said: “It’s okay. That isn’t something to be ashamed of.”
There is nothing wrong with me; I am not sick; I am not perverted; I am not going through a ‘phase.’ I’ve long since come out to my parents and while it was rocky at first, I knew who I was and it wasn’t going to change that just to please someone else.
As we grow older, see more things, it is my hope for that the people in this world will gain compassion. People have different values and different ideas. New friends will constantly surprise you; strange people in your class, people you live with, work with, and talk with. Every person you meet from this moment on will teach you humanism and small worlds give way to broader horizons.
If you find yourself in a situation where someone you care about chooses to open their hearts to you, know this: the person who was your childhood friend, your son or your daughter, sister or brother, is still that very same person. They haven’t changed so don’t change your opinion of them. If you care about them, don’t make them scared to tell you things. We do not choose to be gay, but we do choose whom we tell. Please do not make us regret confiding in you.
For more advice on what to do if someone comes out to you, please visit the Rainbow Room in the CMU. Thanks for reading -stay curious!
I’ve always believed that we can learn from stories. After all, why keep telling them if they don’t bring about anything productive. The story I wish to share with you today is partly my own, and one that is often and unfortunately a common situation.
I used to be very religious. Not so much in a devout way, but the congregation was like a second family to me. I loved the church, I loved the people, and while I hated getting up early on Sundays I did it anyway. The Pastor there was a good man in an older bother sort of way and I trusted him and considered him a friend. So when I –a 13-year-old girl at the time- told him I was attracted to other girls, I expected something reassuring to come of it.
“Don’t worry,” he said calmly. “I know a good psychiatrist.”
Shocked didn’t cover it. I didn’t want to hear that at all. I didn’t want to hear I had to go to some doctor to get ‘fixed.’ The only thing I wanted to hear was, “Don’t worry. That’s not a disease.”
To those of you have experienced it, you’ll know these words to be true: coming out is scary and the better you know someone the harder it is to tell them. Inwardly, we have to fight very hard to find ourselves. Outwardly, we have to fight against the rejection and the hatred of others.
A long and arduous process wouldn’t even begin to describe what I went through before the next time I was able to come out to another adult. When I did though it was to my high school Councilor. She was a woman I barely knew but I was at such a low point in my life I didn’t care what happened anymore. If she were to tell me I had some sort of illness at least our relationship wouldn’t suffer for the heartbreak it caused. But when I told her she just looked at me calmly and said: “It’s okay. That isn’t something to be ashamed of.”
There is nothing wrong with me; I am not sick; I am not perverted; I am not going through a ‘phase.’ I’ve long since come out to my parents and while it was rocky at first, I knew who I was and it wasn’t going to change that just to please someone else.
As we grow older, see more things, it is my hope for that the people in this world will gain compassion. People have different values and different ideas. New friends will constantly surprise you; strange people in your class, people you live with, work with, and talk with. Every person you meet from this moment on will teach you humanism and small worlds give way to broader horizons.
If you find yourself in a situation where someone you care about chooses to open their hearts to you, know this: the person who was your childhood friend, your son or your daughter, sister or brother, is still that very same person. They haven’t changed so don’t change your opinion of them. If you care about them, don’t make them scared to tell you things. We do not choose to be gay, but we do choose whom we tell. Please do not make us regret confiding in you.
For more advice on what to do if someone comes out to you, please visit the Rainbow Room in the CMU. Thanks for reading -stay curious!
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
the message battle.
This is a little lame, but i think this emphasizes the reason I became such a bitter person. The following is a Message battle I had on facebook with a jerk. I had my moments of dropping F-bombs, but then I calmed down. These are the types of people I want everyone to watch out for. I know the urge to smash them in the face with a chair is rising, but contain yourself...
me: please stop posting such cruel things on the RIP wall.
him: please stop being a butthurt faggot
me: you know what you god damn bigot motherfucker you can take all your narrow minded shit and shove it right back up your ass where it belongs. I was trying to be nice, but if you want to get into a fucking message battle with me I'm more than willing to bury you.
him: fine have it your way: I challenge you to a Poke'battle!
me: this is not a pokemon battle. I would say that I'm trying to respect that you have different opinions that me, but your opinions are not worth respecting. Why are you so against people paying respects to people who have died? If you had a friend kill themselves, would you want people bashing them like you're doing?
him: do you forfeit?
me: Forfeit? im still arguing with you. just because Im not stooping to your level of base argument style doesn't mean i forfeit anything. besides, as soon as you started typing you lost.
him: no...you just lost.....the game. and coincedentily so did i
me: .... as funny as i find that, i think I'm going to stop taking to you now. You aren't taking what you say seriously and I'm done with you. if you want to say I backed out, be my guest. you and i will know the truth of this conversation (not that it will weigh on your mind much.) Please try to be more considerate in the future Andrew.
it was at this point that i blocked him because i realized i had been arguing with a man that had the mentality of a 5 year old. he had nothing substantial to say and while he proved himself to be a complete tool, I shall continue to be depressed for the rest of the night.
me: please stop posting such cruel things on the RIP wall.
him: please stop being a butthurt faggot
me: you know what you god damn bigot motherfucker you can take all your narrow minded shit and shove it right back up your ass where it belongs. I was trying to be nice, but if you want to get into a fucking message battle with me I'm more than willing to bury you.
him: fine have it your way: I challenge you to a Poke'battle!
me: this is not a pokemon battle. I would say that I'm trying to respect that you have different opinions that me, but your opinions are not worth respecting. Why are you so against people paying respects to people who have died? If you had a friend kill themselves, would you want people bashing them like you're doing?
him: do you forfeit?
me: Forfeit? im still arguing with you. just because Im not stooping to your level of base argument style doesn't mean i forfeit anything. besides, as soon as you started typing you lost.
him: no...you just lost.....the game. and coincedentily so did i
me: .... as funny as i find that, i think I'm going to stop taking to you now. You aren't taking what you say seriously and I'm done with you. if you want to say I backed out, be my guest. you and i will know the truth of this conversation (not that it will weigh on your mind much.) Please try to be more considerate in the future Andrew.
it was at this point that i blocked him because i realized i had been arguing with a man that had the mentality of a 5 year old. he had nothing substantial to say and while he proved himself to be a complete tool, I shall continue to be depressed for the rest of the night.
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Time to Recognize
Published: october 7th
When asked if the recognition of the Gay Straight Alliance was apparent in MSUM, Lacey Scheelk responded with a flat out and unhesitant “No.” In lieu of that response, freshmen, I pose this question to you: during your campus tours, did your guide make it a point to inform you of the GSA clubroom in the CMU? I’ll bet that most of you would say no. How many of you didn’t even know MSUM had a GSA club till you walked past it on your way to Kise? I’ll bet most of you would raise your hands. The sad fact is that GSA seems to reside in a dark little unknown corner of MSUM’s campus and members of said club are not at all pleased. Justin Barton heartily agrees with Lacey’s observation in saying that “those who are afraid to come out, or get involved would not be required to go out of their way to ask about GSA if its presence was made readily known from the start.”
As a bisexual and active GSA supporter since middle school, my college choice was strongly influenced by what type of community the campus presented. What is MSUM saying to the potential students of a minority community when the mention of the Rainbow Dragon room is sometimes completely avoided? I’ve noticed that people who walk into the room sometimes seem shocked when the find out just where they are and they end up walking right back out with a flustered or annoyed expression. This, in the words of a friend, is just “not cool.”
Perhaps as a freshman three years ago, I was a bit naive in my initial assumption that a tight knit community like Moorhead would not have issues with GSA comings and goings. Perhaps I was even naive in thinking that college would perhaps offer a better experience as a she-oriented individual than high school did. Apparently my assumptions were wrong. Now, I know that it is mostly up to the club itself to promote its events and purpose, but I feel that the general attitude towards gay people on MSUM is still one of misunderstanding. This makes me sad, but it also makes me want to do something. I’m not going the Lavender route and shouting, “Recruit, recruit, recruit,” in any way shape or form, but I’m going to express what I feel should be known as a common truth. The gay community is present here and we are not sitting out anymore. The time of assuming that being attracted to the same sex, or that being confused about gender identity is something to be ashamed of has passed.
Because this campus has a strong conservative presence and there have even been reports of harassment in the past, if I had not happened upon the rainbow flag in the CMU, I don’t think I would have considered enrolling. It is important for people, especially in this time of their lives when strong relationships can be built, to feel that they have a safe place to go and be heard. The GSA community faces enough problems as is, and in a place of higher learning these problems are nothing but a hindrance to progress. It is my humble opinion that to correct these injustices, MSUM’s GSA club should be a noteworthy point on Dragon Day guides’ itinerary. Conservatives may not like it, but we’re here and we’re queer and nothing they say (or don’t say in this case) is going to change it! Thank you for your time. Stay curious.
When asked if the recognition of the Gay Straight Alliance was apparent in MSUM, Lacey Scheelk responded with a flat out and unhesitant “No.” In lieu of that response, freshmen, I pose this question to you: during your campus tours, did your guide make it a point to inform you of the GSA clubroom in the CMU? I’ll bet that most of you would say no. How many of you didn’t even know MSUM had a GSA club till you walked past it on your way to Kise? I’ll bet most of you would raise your hands. The sad fact is that GSA seems to reside in a dark little unknown corner of MSUM’s campus and members of said club are not at all pleased. Justin Barton heartily agrees with Lacey’s observation in saying that “those who are afraid to come out, or get involved would not be required to go out of their way to ask about GSA if its presence was made readily known from the start.”
As a bisexual and active GSA supporter since middle school, my college choice was strongly influenced by what type of community the campus presented. What is MSUM saying to the potential students of a minority community when the mention of the Rainbow Dragon room is sometimes completely avoided? I’ve noticed that people who walk into the room sometimes seem shocked when the find out just where they are and they end up walking right back out with a flustered or annoyed expression. This, in the words of a friend, is just “not cool.”
Perhaps as a freshman three years ago, I was a bit naive in my initial assumption that a tight knit community like Moorhead would not have issues with GSA comings and goings. Perhaps I was even naive in thinking that college would perhaps offer a better experience as a she-oriented individual than high school did. Apparently my assumptions were wrong. Now, I know that it is mostly up to the club itself to promote its events and purpose, but I feel that the general attitude towards gay people on MSUM is still one of misunderstanding. This makes me sad, but it also makes me want to do something. I’m not going the Lavender route and shouting, “Recruit, recruit, recruit,” in any way shape or form, but I’m going to express what I feel should be known as a common truth. The gay community is present here and we are not sitting out anymore. The time of assuming that being attracted to the same sex, or that being confused about gender identity is something to be ashamed of has passed.
Because this campus has a strong conservative presence and there have even been reports of harassment in the past, if I had not happened upon the rainbow flag in the CMU, I don’t think I would have considered enrolling. It is important for people, especially in this time of their lives when strong relationships can be built, to feel that they have a safe place to go and be heard. The GSA community faces enough problems as is, and in a place of higher learning these problems are nothing but a hindrance to progress. It is my humble opinion that to correct these injustices, MSUM’s GSA club should be a noteworthy point on Dragon Day guides’ itinerary. Conservatives may not like it, but we’re here and we’re queer and nothing they say (or don’t say in this case) is going to change it! Thank you for your time. Stay curious.
Poetry and GSA: Coming out
Published: october 7th
As I’m hoping most of you know, MSUM’s Coming Out Week is quickly approaching. The week after National Coming Out week, Oct. 17-23, is the GSA clubs aspiration to encourage students to “share themselves in hopes of encouraging others to feel comfortable with coming out, or their own gender identity,” Justin Braton said, recent MSUM GSA club member and transfer from Mankato state. Whether you identify yourself as a member or an ally, Coming Out Week is a gratifying experience for everyone. So far, activities planned and organized by our dedicated GSA club members and friends include: Chalk night, Coming Out night, and open mic night and poetry reading at The Red Raven, organized by Lacey Scheelk former 10 percent Club Secretary and Justin Braton.
In previous years, Coming Out Week has colored our campus with stunning sidewalk art and slogan’s. Citywide recognition was gained for the display when an act of vandalism drew the attention of The Forum, but recognition gained through such unfortunate means did little to touch on the intention of such an important week. The point, Lacey said, “Is to come to terms and accept who you are no matter how you define yourself.”
This years Coming Out week will be a landmark for GSA in the introduction of a new event. In order to link together two small communities in the Fargo-Moorhead area, Lacey and Justin have organized the first open poetry reading that focuses on the works of the Gay Straight Alliance community. On Oct. 21 from 7 p.m.-9 p.m., The Red Raven will be opening its’ doors to whomever wishes to share poems or stories related to their experiences as a GSA individual.
The event will kick off with original verse written by Lacey and Justin whereupon the floor will be given to whoever is brave enough to step up. Advertising for this event will be highlighted in the prior weeks Yellow Bicycle publication and on Facebook, but it’s up to word of mouth to really get this event kick-started. The 2010 Coming Out week at MSUM will be a success if students and faculty like you make it such. There are many passionate individuals working very hard to make this campus a home for everyone and proper support is needed and appreciated from the community.
Remember that these poets are your friends and neighbors, members of the community that make up MSUM, so come to The Red Raven on Oct. 21 from 7 p.m.-9 p.m. and show them your support! For questions or comments about what is sure to be a memorable and inspiring event, see GLBTQAI Poetry Open Mic Night Facebook page.
As I’m hoping most of you know, MSUM’s Coming Out Week is quickly approaching. The week after National Coming Out week, Oct. 17-23, is the GSA clubs aspiration to encourage students to “share themselves in hopes of encouraging others to feel comfortable with coming out, or their own gender identity,” Justin Braton said, recent MSUM GSA club member and transfer from Mankato state. Whether you identify yourself as a member or an ally, Coming Out Week is a gratifying experience for everyone. So far, activities planned and organized by our dedicated GSA club members and friends include: Chalk night, Coming Out night, and open mic night and poetry reading at The Red Raven, organized by Lacey Scheelk former 10 percent Club Secretary and Justin Braton.
In previous years, Coming Out Week has colored our campus with stunning sidewalk art and slogan’s. Citywide recognition was gained for the display when an act of vandalism drew the attention of The Forum, but recognition gained through such unfortunate means did little to touch on the intention of such an important week. The point, Lacey said, “Is to come to terms and accept who you are no matter how you define yourself.”
This years Coming Out week will be a landmark for GSA in the introduction of a new event. In order to link together two small communities in the Fargo-Moorhead area, Lacey and Justin have organized the first open poetry reading that focuses on the works of the Gay Straight Alliance community. On Oct. 21 from 7 p.m.-9 p.m., The Red Raven will be opening its’ doors to whomever wishes to share poems or stories related to their experiences as a GSA individual.
The event will kick off with original verse written by Lacey and Justin whereupon the floor will be given to whoever is brave enough to step up. Advertising for this event will be highlighted in the prior weeks Yellow Bicycle publication and on Facebook, but it’s up to word of mouth to really get this event kick-started. The 2010 Coming Out week at MSUM will be a success if students and faculty like you make it such. There are many passionate individuals working very hard to make this campus a home for everyone and proper support is needed and appreciated from the community.
Remember that these poets are your friends and neighbors, members of the community that make up MSUM, so come to The Red Raven on Oct. 21 from 7 p.m.-9 p.m. and show them your support! For questions or comments about what is sure to be a memorable and inspiring event, see GLBTQAI Poetry Open Mic Night Facebook page.
Sex and Such
First article.
Published:
No one’s going to tell you that relationships are all smooth sailing. The truth is they are messy and they can be even more so when they aren’t between a man and a woman. I’m sure you’ve all seen the GSA room in the CMU with the bright rainbow flag and wide open door, occasionally glimpsing a person reading a book or someone typing on the computer. You know it’s there and you see it’s active. However, what many people don’t know is that MSUM has a larger GLBT community than most of its students realize. In fact, I believe this campus has the largest concentrated GSA and GLBT community in the area. That’s a lot of people, right? Right. This column, focusing on the issues and concerns of the GLBT community at MSUM, will be the first of its kind regularly published in the Advocate. This population is now getting a much needed voice that will reach you: the students of MSUM, and hopefully encourage a better and more supportive understanding between everyone on the campus. After all, how do you come to know someone if there is no communication? I along with the other members of the Advocate staff have high hopes for this column and active response and feedback from all of you readers would be much appreciated. Spread the love I say! But I digress. Transsexual, bisexual, asexual (well maybe not you guys), homosexual, or straight. Due to the nature of human interaction, a relationship between two or more people is bound to have it’s kinks, questions, and concerns. In short, it’s going to have its issues. Some of these issues are important to share with the world, and some of these issues, if brought to the attention of others, no longer become an issue in the future. So who better to start gathering the attention than a friendly, non-biased bisexual who has no qualms getting down to the nitty-gritty of any subject. Don’t get me wrong though. Even though I am bisexual, by no means do I assume or mean to imply that I am an expert on all things GLBT. No one is truly an expert on such matters but that is why we have this column. I’ll do my very best to represent the voices of my fellow students and state the issues that demand attention. I certainly do have a fair share of experience that I can offer to the column myself, and I’m hoping that others will embrace this opportunity as I have. Embrace your individual voices my friends, because if you don’t use them, you’re never going to be heard. I’ll take the risk and say that now that the initial ‘acceptance stage’ is out of the way, we need to step up and put a little time into the ‘understanding stage’. Understanding the person sitting next to you, the person across the hall, the person sitting in the GSA room reading a book, maybe even understanding yourself. You are a college student. You live, love, work, and play in Moorhead, and so do I: your friendly, non-biased bisexual columnist. Thus, with that, I formally announce that the Advocate is here representing with open hearts, minds, doors, and closets, the issues important to a strong and vital community on MSUM. Stay tuned, and stay curious.
Published:
No one’s going to tell you that relationships are all smooth sailing. The truth is they are messy and they can be even more so when they aren’t between a man and a woman. I’m sure you’ve all seen the GSA room in the CMU with the bright rainbow flag and wide open door, occasionally glimpsing a person reading a book or someone typing on the computer. You know it’s there and you see it’s active. However, what many people don’t know is that MSUM has a larger GLBT community than most of its students realize. In fact, I believe this campus has the largest concentrated GSA and GLBT community in the area. That’s a lot of people, right? Right. This column, focusing on the issues and concerns of the GLBT community at MSUM, will be the first of its kind regularly published in the Advocate. This population is now getting a much needed voice that will reach you: the students of MSUM, and hopefully encourage a better and more supportive understanding between everyone on the campus. After all, how do you come to know someone if there is no communication? I along with the other members of the Advocate staff have high hopes for this column and active response and feedback from all of you readers would be much appreciated. Spread the love I say! But I digress. Transsexual, bisexual, asexual (well maybe not you guys), homosexual, or straight. Due to the nature of human interaction, a relationship between two or more people is bound to have it’s kinks, questions, and concerns. In short, it’s going to have its issues. Some of these issues are important to share with the world, and some of these issues, if brought to the attention of others, no longer become an issue in the future. So who better to start gathering the attention than a friendly, non-biased bisexual who has no qualms getting down to the nitty-gritty of any subject. Don’t get me wrong though. Even though I am bisexual, by no means do I assume or mean to imply that I am an expert on all things GLBT. No one is truly an expert on such matters but that is why we have this column. I’ll do my very best to represent the voices of my fellow students and state the issues that demand attention. I certainly do have a fair share of experience that I can offer to the column myself, and I’m hoping that others will embrace this opportunity as I have. Embrace your individual voices my friends, because if you don’t use them, you’re never going to be heard. I’ll take the risk and say that now that the initial ‘acceptance stage’ is out of the way, we need to step up and put a little time into the ‘understanding stage’. Understanding the person sitting next to you, the person across the hall, the person sitting in the GSA room reading a book, maybe even understanding yourself. You are a college student. You live, love, work, and play in Moorhead, and so do I: your friendly, non-biased bisexual columnist. Thus, with that, I formally announce that the Advocate is here representing with open hearts, minds, doors, and closets, the issues important to a strong and vital community on MSUM. Stay tuned, and stay curious.
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